Happily Married

                   Yes, we are now Mr and Mrs! It's quite unbelievable to think that we started this year with doubts and apprehensions about our relation and we are about to end it as husband and wife. It has been a remarkable year!

                   How does it feel to be Mrs? I keep getting asked. I cannot explain it in words. Suddenly, I am doing chores I had no idea about. I am cooking stuff I had never paid attention to. I am making lists of household stuff to buy. The list is never ending.

                   I felt overwhelmed the first few days. I do not speak the local language, I am at loss for directions and I do not know to handle a house. It has been exhausting been a Mrs.

                  I stand near the kitchen stove, warming myself before the flame, my feet all cold in the winter, the chilled wind making me shiver. S stands behind me, hovering all the time, pouring the tea or getting the plates ready. On days when we finish the breakfast early and he is ready for work but has some minutes to spare, he cuddles with me until its the right time to go.

                 I surf through the net for the best recipe to use for lunch. I get going to get everything done. All by myself, I try to experiment all that I have seen mom do through the years. One afternoon, I managed to burn my hand while using the pressure cooker. I ran to get the tube of toothpaste before my skin got blistered. I rubbed it in and stretched my hand in the freezer. Messaging S with the one hand, I cleared the mess with the other. Lunch time S rushed in with a tube of burnol, worried about the injury, gently applying it on my burn. In moments like those, I feel its all worth the pain.

                On most evenings, we drive by to get the grocery. On days I am too tired with all the work, he helps me clean the dishes. On Saturday nights, we drink to get me high and S marvels at my capacity to just drink and sleep. I do not get high. I just sleep.

                Some days I roll out an extra special meal and wait for him to taste. I am delighted when he tells me that it turned out good. At home, Dad and bro almost liked anything I cooked. But with S, I always wait for the response.

               S is been working hard. We haven't had time to go exploring the city. Nor have we taken a holiday post wedding. Nothing out of the ordinary yet!   After an ordinary day, on a cold winter night, I am all warm beside S, snuggling close and feeling blessed. Yes, happily married indeed!

                                             

2014 you have been generous. Looking forward to a brighter 2015! 

Pre-wedding :D

                   I had been waiting for November to come.  This is our last month as singles. As the days are passing by, the feeling is unsettling. The initial excitement is giving way to nervousness. Go with the flow, I often have myself thinking. Yet, at times I feel over whelmed with the changes that are to come. I have no idea what waits ahead. I am without a plan and the control freak in me getting paranoid. Ofcourse I have a plan. Only it is not sketched to the last details.

                    Months in advance, I had booked for our prewedding shoot. I wanted it all decided before hand. The first time I saw a fellow blogger do it, I wanted one! Oh, I love captured moments and more so the candid ones. Dressing up and being the perfect couple in love just like in the movies was exciting. S did not have the same opinion. He proposed the idea of a post wedding shoot. Although post wedding shoots do have that charm, it is more about arranged marriages and the post nuptial glow. I wanted our dating days captured. After a lot of deliberations, we chose the photographers for our pre-wedding shoot.

                     The location had to the place where we went every single time. National Park. Those who have been reading my posts know about our Kanheri trek. We chose Kanheri caves as the location. I have been counting days ever since.

                     S flew down a day before the shoot. We spent the day shopping for him and going around. Next day, early morning we left for the shoot. The slight chill in the air added to the feel. When we reached the gate along with the photographers, it was closed. No entry to vehicles till 7.30! We had no idea about this and had about an hour to kill.

                     We shot pictures on the road, walking about, sitting in the auto. It was actually fun. It gave us time to understand what was needed. Once we were inside the park, it was a field day. We covered quite a lot of places.  All in all, it was an experience worth the effort and money. Maybe I should write about tips to do the prewedding :P

                     Anyway, here's a shot from the day.

                     

                    Less than a month left to go!

Of wedding and shopping!

             Since the last post about our wedding announcement, life has changed by leaps and bounds. S and I were amused and unprepared for the ease with which our relation was accepted and the speed with which our marriage preparations were set in motion. It seemed like we were dreaming, for a long time. With our wedding being 3 months away, the reality is finally sinking. We are going to be man and wife on 7th of December, 2014 at 11.23 am!

             When it was decided that our parents would meet on 31st March, little did I know what that day had in store. I met his family in a temple. Later, they asked everyone to talk about it at length at their home. I wasn't allowed to be present as girl isn't supposed to go to the guy's house before marriage. It pissed me off big time. I was sent off to an engagement where some of my relatives were present. I waited in anticipation and anxiety. When my parents came to pick me up, Dad told me that the wedding is fixed for 7th of December. I was speechless! I was annoyed at S for not being with me and overwhelmed by the proximity of the wedding. I was taken over by mixed feelings. Scared, happy, annoyed, tensed. The next whole week wasn't easy on S and me. We had our arguments, endless chats and his constant assurance that everything would be fine.

            I was a little taken aback by the kind of approach his family had. Joint families, unbending traditions, lack of independent decisions. I have grown up in a nuclear family and have been used to making my own choice and standing by it. Moreover, a lot of emphasis on individual preference was given in my house. I wondered if I would fit in with a family that made collective choices. Would they like me? Would they find me arrogant and selfish? Would I feel myself if I tried to please them? It was a battle of individuality for me. I place my individuality on a high pedestal. I am immensely guarded about my planning and hate it if I lose control. It took a lot of convincing from S that he wouldn't make me do anything I don't want to. That family expectations won't weigh on me once we are in Bangalore. It would be just S and me.

          S came to meet me in July. It was a secret date. I wasn't still comfortable with the idea of telling at home that I am going with S. He surprised me with a fashion jewellery set. Just the day before our date, Mom and I had gone shopping. There she set eyes on a similar kind of jewellery and bought it for me. When I saw the gift that S got me, I couldn't help thinking about the similarity in their selection!
         If there is someone I trust blindly when it comes to shopping, it is my Mom. I need her with me to tell me if it would be good for me. I make foolish choices when I shop alone or with others. The only exception is S. If I have no choice but to shop without Mom, I constantly click pictures and ask S for his opinion even if I have friends waiting outside the dressing room! He is always ready to help me with shopping and that is one thing that I absolutely adore about him. He doesn't just accompany me to the shop and wait outside but actively participates in what I am buying. For a person who is as confused as I m while shopping, it has to be a big plus in the man I am going to marry.
        For past one month, weekends are dedicated to shopping. There is a never ending list of things to buy. I wonder how I am going to take it all!

       September end I will be going to Mangalore again. My cousin sister is getting married. S and I are going to shop for the bridal saree and jewellery along with our families. I am excited and can't wait for September 24 to come.

       Today I packed my first bag. Yes, it was tough. The freshly dry cleaned festive clothes were lying around for a long time. Mom had told me to pack them in the bag and arrange all the stuff that I shop every week. I have been delaying it. As the 4 anarkali suits and one sari was neatly placed in the bag, I felt a heaviness that I haven't experienced before. 3 months are all I have in this house, this city.. At evening, when I went to the Ganesh pandal, I had goosebumps on seeing the large idol. There is a long association of 22 years. When I was barely a year old, the Ganesh idol would be placed right behind our house. In the coming years, it shifted to the large ground. Today as I had  eyeful of the elephant God, I was teary. Why are good byes so difficult? Would I ever get to see my beloved idol again? It is a stupid question to ask because God is where faith is. But do the bonds of memories untangle so easily?

     
       

To Grandma, with love

              It is no news that I m a foodie. The sight of food makes me happy. Hot fried chicken, the layered and spicy dum biryani, mouth-watering chicken tandoori, the gooey dark chocolate cake, the list of my cravings is endless. But if I had to name my favorite, it would  be my grandma's cooking. Nothing in the world compares to her cooking.

              Nani has only one goal in life- To feed everyone. You can never go empty-stomach from her house. Eating is my passion and serving is hers. Having spent my childhood with her, I have relished her cooking. If there is food I dream of, it is her delicacies!

             I miss dal made by her. It was an everyday treat. The hot simmering of mustard, the aroma of curry leaves, the sound of her pouring the dal to the masala would make my stomach grumble. The tomatoes, the chillies, the salt, everything in the dal make a delightful flavor that arouses the taste buds. Hot dal garnished with coriander and white rice were what I lived on.
             When I was a kid, my parents had taken me to Mangalore for holidays. The boiled rice and curry were unknown to me. I despised them. I longed to go back to Nani. I starved myself and ate only bananas. The moment I came back, I rushed to Nani and told her I want dal rice made by her. After days I had eaten a proper meal!

            I miss the Sundays when she would make soft, fluffy idlis and crisp dosas and spicy green coconut chutney. Sunday mornings, she would send it through grandpa and I would wake up the treat of idlis and dosas.
           
           Rainy evenings, she would set to make onion and potato pakoras. She would sometimes make sweet potato pakoras too. The fried, warmth of the pakoras which ginger tea would be a perfect combo with the chill in the air.

          The savory mutton curry that she made on rare occasions makes me drool every time I think of it. The rich red colour of the curry  would have me salivating. The small cut, fresh tender meat would be cooked to perfection and the zesty curry would be heaven for my gastric pleasures. She would call me everytime she made mutton curry and I would dunk fresh bread in the curry and enjoy my meal.

         I miss the fresh lime juice that she would make for me. The salty and sweet fluid would tingle my senses and  make me want more of it. She always made it in excess for me. Some evenings she would make beetroot halwa. The sweet dish was a rarity because she had a belief that sweet caused stomach ache. Her halwa was to die for! Lavish gajar halwa would be made only in winter. Lot of ghee, khoya would make it deliciously fattening and filling. The orange colored halwa with dry fruits in it would be enticing!

        Ever since grandma moved to Mangalore, my indulgences have been limited to the visits there. Age has also made grandma slower and less active to cook like before. I miss her food. I miss her.

        Grandma always paid attention to how she served the food. No broken idli or torn dosa would make it to the plate. She gave importance to the crockery used and made food look even more appetizing. Perhaps only the best of the crockery can give her cooking an even more beautiful look. A look at BOROSIL variety was all I needed to be reminded of Grandma's cooking. How she would love to serve in those beautiful dishes and bowls!
       Next time I visit, I m taking some of those crockery to her. To Grandma, with love.

This post is written for My beautiful food contest held by Indiblogger and Borosil

Hooked and Booked

           

                                 
               
               The past week has been too stressful for me and S. After much deliberation and planning and untoward incidents that hindered the plan, I could finally accompany my family to our hometown.

               On 31st March our families met and our marriage is fixed for the 7th of December :)

              Although I feel like screaming it out to the whole world, I have to wait a little longer to do that.

              The feeling is yet to sink in and words are few.

              Until Later
              M 

A step ahead in love..

              The last post feels like ages back. The days are passing in a blink and I m at loss for time. There is just so much that I want to put into words but the thoughts scatter into a multiple paths.
              Last month, I turned 22. This year, I had decided to spend my birthday with my family. The day was spent at college and frankly wasn't too good with the result being declared the same day and I getting less than what I had hoped for. However I dumped the mess at college and returned home. I cut the birthday cake with only my family around. Later we all went to a temple and then for dinner. It was different. Last few years, I have been going out with my friends for dinner without even thinking that I missed out my family from the celebration. The cake was all they got. They never stopped me from going out, knowing that it was the age where spending time with friends is important. I took so much for granted. This birthday, which might be the last one at home, I realized how much I missed the simplicity of being with family.

               S was working over time to make the trip happen. Finally on the 26th of Jan, S met my family. I was really nervous that morning when I was waiting for S near my house. Accompanying him, I entered into the compound where Papa was talking to neighbors. S flashed a smile to him and I freezed ! The next few minutes were tense in the house. We waited for  Papa to come home while Mom was busy with sorting idlis for S ( She wanted to put out only the perfect round ones :P)

             I was made to serve idli sambar to S and then I sat next to him as he ate and Mom and Papa just made small talks. Once tea was served, began the grilling :P We had anticipated a lot of questions and prepared for it but to our surprise I didn't even have to open my  mouth !

            Mom began to list out my shortcomings. It was never ending list. Papa came to my defense, highlighting that I wasn't such a bad girl :P Mom thought it was her duty to warn S of the dangers of marrying me! At one point, S actually told her that I wasn't so bad and I don't cause him much trouble :P I m sure he had my parents at that.

          The talks became easy and relaxed and my parents found it smooth to converse with S. We were both sent to a temple and we came back rushing after the darshan. I and S had lunch at home and then we were allowed to go to mall. S left later that evening. The meeting was a success.

         Since that day, the talks are on about marriage and all the planning :O Next step is our parents meeting each other and I hope it all goes well.

        In another news, I hope this is our last valentine away from each other. I can't believe we had 7 valentine days away from each other. A journey of 7 years!!
        S really surprised me last night. I kind of had the hint that he could call but not what he had in store :) IT was a beautiful start to 2014, a very special birthday and a very romantic Valentine :)

                                   

A year of Changes

             The first week of the new year is not yet done, so technically I m not really late :P Wish you all a very happy 2014!
             
             What did you guys to welcome the new year? Facebook is still flooded with photographs of the New Year vacations and parties. As for me, I slept in 2013 and woke up in 2014 :P
             I have never been big on New year parties. It is what I do the rest of the year that counts right? I have spent all my new year with family. We used to order food from outside earlier as waiting for tables in over crowded restaurants did not really appeal to any of us. In the recent years we have stopped doing that. My brother's birthday is just a day before so all the celebrations happen that day. 31st is usually lazing at home, watching award shows, having a quite home made dinner and sleeping.

             S was in Delhi for work this year. We kept chatting on watsapp till 11 pm and I didn't know when I slept. When I woke up, it was 5 am already and S had called at 12, sent messages and then finally gone to sleep. I called him up and picked up drowsily, talking to me like the first time I called him on a New Year. It felt like we were back there. A journey of 8 years that passed since that New year!

            This year is going to be a year of changes for most people I know. Many friends will start working, many will be going abroad for higher education, many friends are getting settled, cousins are on a look out for a life partner and I will be starting on an exciting ride.

             My parents now know about S and me. S would come down this month mostly to meet them. I m keeping my fingers crossed. So thrilled and so nervous about the new turn in my love story. Dad agreeing was a total surprise. I had expected him to be mad at me, discuss a lot and then maybe come around but his instant approval came as a huge surprise! S and I were so so happy that day and now I can't wait for S to officially meet the family!
     
             Hoping that 2014 becomes the best year of my life :)